Nathan and Mary quotes

March 28, 2011
Me: Mary (3), when we move to a new house we take all of your toys, we don’t leave them here.
Mary: And our clothes.
Me: Yes.
Mary: And all of our arms, and all of our legs…

Nathan: If you don’t buy a book at the book fair when we go to parent teacher student conferences, my teacher will call you and send you to the principal’s office to get in trouble.

Me: Nathan and Mary, why do you keep stealing all of my gum? Is it because you don’t care about the consequences? Do you not think Mommy or Daddy will care? Why do you do it?
Nathan stared blankly.
Me: Nathan, why do you steal it?
Nathan (5) (innocently and politely): Mom, would you please repeat the options? Oh, it’s because it’s yummy.

Nathan: Daddy, can you please blow on my food?
Daddy: You can do it, you’re a big boy.
Nathan: I know, but I’m not a blowing big boy!

Me: Where are the socks you borrowed from Jeremiah?
Nathan: Here they are….Mom, smell them to see if they smell like Jeremiah.
Me: No, thank you.
Nathan: Fine, I’ll do it.

(Nathan is making me a valentine’s card)
Mary: Nathan, that’s my candy you’re giving Mommy!
Nathan: Mommy doesn’t have any, you have to give it to her.
Mary: No.
Nathan: Mom, Mary is not choosing the right. (to Mary) You have to share!

Nathan: Mom, when James and John grow up bigger let’s change their names to Nathan.

Me: I feel like a frump.
Matthew: What’s a frump?
Me: Umm…just feeling not attractive. (thinking of my hair, how it’s hard to even get dressed in regular clothes somedays, etc. Ya’ll know what I’m saying).
Matthew: I am so attracted to frumps. Raarrr.


Me: Nathan, you are going to stay home from school today.
Nathan: Why?
Me: Because you are sick. I want you to rest. And I don’t want you to throw up at school.
Nathan: Mom, let me go, they have Kleenex to wipe my mouth off at school if I throw up.

Me: Mary, how’d you get so cute?
Mary: From Daddy.
Me: Only daddy? Anybody else?
Mary: Just daddy.

Me: Nathan, where’d you get that pencil? (almost seems like he has a new one a day)
Nathan: Well…there’s this girl on the bus who wants me to like pencils…so she keeps giving them to me so I’ll like them.

Matthew: No, there’s no drinks of water tonight.
Nathan: I have to have a drink of water or I will die.
Matthew: There’s no drinks tonight.
Nathan: But I’m a waterman!